complaint to the IOCP:

To Whom It May Concern,

Subject: Formal Complaint Regarding the Treatment of my mother

I am writing to make a formal complaint regarding the arrest and overnight detainment of my mother, on the night of Friday, 13th December, at ‘the named’ Police Station. The treatment she received demonstrates a lack of understanding of domestic abuse, surviver trauma, and (named county) Police’s obligations under its Domestic Abuse Policy and Safe & Together principles.

Background Context:

My mother is a survivor of sexual abuse, coercive control, financial abuse, physical abuse, and domestic abuse throughout her 40+ year relationship with my father, Since leaving him in December 2023, after a particularly violent incident where he broke her finger, she has been living with me for safety and recovery. (Named county) Police are currently investigating my mother’s allegations against my father, with (named) Detective handling the case.

The Incident:

1. Unjust Arrest

On 13th December, my mother attempted to regain access to her property after my father had indicated his absence via social media. This was communicated through the Ring Doorbell system. Upon arriving with my sibling, the locks were found broken, and three aggressive individuals confronted my family members.

Despite being the victim of abuse and the owner of the property, two (named county) officers arrested my mother based on a warrant. This arrest took place without consideration of her status as a domestic abuse survivor or the trauma she has endured.

2. Custody and Overnight Detainment

• My mother was held overnight without reasonable justification.

• Family members, including my aunt, who attempted to deliver messages of concern, were disregarded.

• Calls to the 101 line and the custody suite were met with indifference, and requests for her release, given her vulnerability, were ignored.

• The following morning, an officer informed me of counter-allegations made by my father in relation to a sexual abuse incident-this information was distressing and not previously disclosed to me.

3. Insensitive and Victim-Blaming Interview

During her interview, my mother was subjected to questions that reflect a lack of domestic abuse awareness:

• “You were with him for 40 years; if you were that unhappy, why didn’t you leave?”

• “Why are you not divorced yet?”

These questions place undue blame on the survivor, ignoring the documented pattern of coercive control and psychological manipulation outlined in (named county) Domestic Abuse Strategy 2024-2029 and the Safe & Together Model principles.

Grounds for Complaint:

(named county) Police’s actions violate their own policies and frameworks:

1. Safe & Together Model: The Safe & Together approach centres on holding perpetrators accountable and supporting survivors in maintaining safety and stability. My mother’s arrest undermines her safety and wellbeing while prioritising the claims of the perpetrator.

2. (named county) Domestic Abuse Strategy (2024-2029):

• The vision is for every survivor to be “seen, safe, and heard.” My mother’s treatment was dismissive and re-traumatising.

• The Strategy highlights the need to avoid victim-blaming language and to engage with trauma-informed practices—neither was demonstrated during this incident.

The Impact:

This ordeal has caused significant harm:

• My mother’s physical and mental health has deteriorated further.

• My own health, as her child and caregiver, has been severely impacted, exacerbating my seizures and hospitalisations.

• Our family is left feeling vulnerable, unheard, and distrustful of (named county) Police’s ability to protect survivors of abuse.

Requested Actions:

1. A formal apology to my mother, acknowledging the mishandling of her case.

2. A full review of why my mother was arrested and detained overnight, including an explanation of any failure to implement (named county) Police’s domestic abuse policies.

3. Assurance that officers involved will receive domestic abuse and trauma-informed training to prevent such insensitive and harmful actions in the future.

4. Confirmation of steps (named county) Police will take to prioritise survivors’ safety and hold perpetrators accountable in line with the Safe & Together Model.

I trust this complaint will be treated with urgency and care. I look forward to your response.